Vegas Baby!!!

Hit the road nice and early on our way to Vegas, one of the most important stops of our trip in my eyes anyway. The route was to bring us over the Hoover Dam, one of the Engineering Marvels in the US. And it is. Many of you will know it as the dam Harrison Ford jumped off in The Fugitive but I know it as the dam with the concrete that is still yet to cure, despite being laid over 60 years. The lake it has created is known as Lake Powell and the first thing that strikes you as you look at the lake is the bleached rock indicating how the water level has dropped over the last number of years. We turned on the generator, turned the A/C up to max to combat the unbelievable heat and had some lunch here after I took some photos and soon we were back on the road.

After a load of raod works we finally got to the city limits. Unfortunately we didn't approach from LA so we didn't get to pass the famous "Welcome To Fabulous Las Vegas" but we were still left in awe as we drove through the desert and suddenly you come upon this city in the middle of nowhere. And then the skyline of strip dominates out of nowhere. Ita couldn't bring me 

there quick enough. Eventually we made it to the Luxor, an eqyptian themed hotal and casino with a pyrmaid shaped main building housing the casino and alot of hotel rooms. They extended the resort with a tower out the back adding a number of hotel rooms after the original construction. We drove up to self park and were directed by a security guard where to leave our vehicle while we went to check in. We grabbed our packed rucksack and made the short stroll up to reception to check in.

Before we made it to the check-in desk we were stopped by a Luxor worker who asked us if we were married. No. Were living together. Yes. Were over 25. Yes. She then showed us to a desk where a well dressed man named Michael offered us some show tickets. We wanted to see the Bodies exhibition so he had our attention (The same bodies show that was in Dublin last March/April). The Luxor are involved in a Timeshare developement a bit down the Strip (the undeveloped part) and for $50 we could get 2 Bodies tickets and $125 in gaming chips/restaurant vouchers/spa treatments if we attended a 2 hour timeshare presentation. Now neither of us are fools and we are both well able to say no under pressure so we signed up. $160 for $50 and a couple of hours out of the heat when it's too hot to do much else sounds like a good deal to me.

We then went to check in and were told that we were entitled to a "complimentary upgrade". I enquired as to what extra we were getting and it was basically a bath tub but we were in the tower instead of the pyramid. Before we left I was told that the best part of staying in the Luxor was staying in the pyramid because of the lifts so we politely declined the "upgrade". We went to the inclinators (like elevators but since they are rising up the outside of a pyramid it's like being on an escalator in an elevator - quite bizarre). We got to the room to discover that it they had only just started to clean it and there were two double beds and not a king bed as we had booked so it was back down to complain to the Manager. We talked to the Manager who was a bit of a witch with a B and all she could do was give us the "upgrade" we were offered at the beginning. I argued the point that we booked a king size in the pyramid and not the tower and she countered with the small print that rooms are not guaranteed and are only subject to availability. I wasn't in the mood to argue so we took the "upgrade", dropped our bags up and headed back to the RV. By this stage security were really annoyed with us since we were supposed to get our keys, move our vehicle and then go to our room, not the way we did it. It didn't bother us so we went and parked and headed back up to the room. 

Emer went down to the pool while I watched the basketball. When Emer got back we went for dinner. Vegas is famous for it's all you can eat buffets so we decided to try one of them out. We were quite hungry and reckoned we could get some Irish value from one so checked online for the best ones. A few searches and it beacme apparant that Planet Hollywood was one of the best as well as being realtively cheap so we headed off there. The second we left the hotel we were blown away by how hot is still was, despite it being 9pm. We made it to the the hotel and paid our $28 each and hit the buffet. We both ate like Kings, choosing from Italian, Chinese, Indian and American cuisines as well as having water and Pepsi brought to our table and refilled throughout the meal. When both of us were uncomfortably full we decided to walk it off by having a stroll along the strip. It was as colourful and entertaining as we both expected. We saw the founatins dance at the Bellagio, the volcano erupt at the Mirage, the scrams from the rollercoaster at New York New York, we walked under the Eiffel Tower among the slots of Paris, we listened to the Gondoliers serinade their passengers with Opera extracts in the Venetian and enjoyed many other spectacles along the strip. Our paths parted at the MGM Grand where I went to play poker for a while.

I sat down with $130 in chips at a full table before midnight determined to do well. For those of you reading this expecting to hear me fulfill my plan of driving a Lambourgini the money situation is a little tight to allow for that luxury so I needed to be uber-successful over the next day or two to allow that to become a reality. Anyway, the cards weren't being nice to me so I sat there patiently picking up the odd dollar or two to keep my chip stack as I started. Things started to heat up but still no cards came my way. Eventually my big bling was raised to $15 by the first to act and was called by two more, I looked down at two Kings and went all in, only to be called by the short stack who had about $50. He had Ace Jack and caught an Ace to cause a bit of hit to my stack. Over the next hour I slowly built it back up to over $100. The next major hand I was involved in occured when I was small blind and I got in cheaply with Queen Jack. The flop had 2 queens and 2 clubs. Being first to act I wanted to get rid of the flush draw so I raised it $15 and had 2 callers. The turn brought another club so I raised it $23 to show I wasn't afraid of the flush. One guy folded straight away and the other reluctantly called so I was a little worried. The river brought a Jack to give me a full house so I went all in. After a bit of humming and hawing the other player called an showed his King high flush. Needless to say he wasn't happy when I showed him my full house. I pulled in the chips, about $250 of them. Now poker players know that it is an unwritten rule that you don't leave the table after a big win so I got a drink and hung around a few hands. During this time two young fellas sat down at the table. They were in Vegas celebrating graduating from College and had alot of money and weren't afraid to get their chips into the middle so I decided to hang around and see if I could get involved in a pot with them. The minutes ticked by and their stacks went up and down but I never got the cards to get involved with them. Eventually I was raised when I had Ace King so I bit back and had one of them call. $40 in the pot and the flop came King, 9, 4 with different suits. I checked and he raised $25 so I came over the top with a $60 raise. He thought for a second and went all-in. This was my chance. I called and he showed Queen Jack. The turn was a 7. There was over $400 in the middle and I started to dream of driving the Gallardo. Most of you know where this is going - a 10 on the river gave him a straight and my hours of patience were all wiped away. I shook his hand, accepted his apologies and headed off to bed. To say I was disappointed would be an understatement but that's poker - I got my money in while I was ahead and he got lucky. I have done it to many people in the past. It took a fair bit of self restraint not to take out more money walking past the ATM's on the way out of the casino but I made it back to bed without doing it. At 5.30am - that's Vegas for you.

The alarm went off it seemed 20 minutes later to get us up for the timeshare presentation. We got a bus out to the complex, had our free breakfast and listened to the presentation. We chatted to our guide for the day and told him about our trip - he seemed to know we were only there for the gifts and showed us around while talking about sport and other interests we had in common. We got up to the money part of the presentation, had our fill of the free lunch and politely declined the many "special one time offers" that the international manager offered us. He reluctantly let us leave and we headed back to the bus. Or so we thought. We were shown to a room where we were met by a "Head Office Representative" who wanted feedback on what we thought about the presentation. Now ewe were thruthful and said it might be something we would be interested in in the future. She tried offering us even better special offers, trying to get us to commit to giving them a few hundred dollars a a deposit then and there. I interupted her, looked her square in the eyes and said "No" numerous times. She didn't seem to accept this and continued trying to sell this "one-time offer" to us. Now as I said both of us know to expect this so we completely blanked her and looked at each other and she got the hint. She thanked us for coming and brought us out to the next room where we got our gifts. We had $125 to divide between food and gaming - Emer thought we should get $100/$25 food/gaming but I persuaded here the split should be $75/$50. We hopped on the bus back to the hotel and went back to our room.

Quick aside. For anyone else who has been to Vegas, did you have a problem with static electricity? It seemed that any time either of us touched something metal we were getting a shock. I seemed to be getting it worse, to the extent that when I went to give Emer a kiss I got a shock on my lips. Maybe it was the Egyptians trying to tell me something.

After the timeshare "presentation" we cashed in our Bodies vouchers for tickets. The Bodies exhibition is an exhibition in the style of a museum that explores the various functions of a body, from the bones to the muscles, arteries, organs and everything in between. It presents them using dissected body segments and groups. It's a fascinating exhibition, at times creepy and wierd, but fascinating the whole way through. After this the lack of sleep from the night before caught up with me and I headed for a nap while Emer went for a workout and a swim in the pool. The alarm went off at 6 to get me up to watch the Lakers game. We watched the start of it while getting ready for dinner. We decided to treat ourselves after sitting through the crap this morning so we went to "Tender", the posh steakhouse in the Luxor. Emer ordered the 14 oz. Striploin and I ordered the 24 oz. Porterhouse. We both got French Fries and I got some carrots as well to keep the meal healthy. The steaks arrived and were cooked to perfection. Emer's was a striploin steak (imagine a rasher or pork chop shape) as thick as the finest fillet you would get at home, mine was a 24 oz. T-Bone with a fillet steak on one side and a striploin on the other. They were both so big it seemed that the weights were cooked and not pre-cooked as at home. Emer's beat her and I just about finished mine, leaving a good few french fries behind as much as I didn't want to. We asked for the bill as the Lakers game was getting towards the end. We were shocked when it came and it was $9 for each of the French Fries and another $9 for the carrots. We had the $75 vouchers but it still ended up being more than we expected. The waiters sly move here cost him in tip and we headed over to the bookies station to watch the end of the Lakers game with the considerable crowd that had gathered (albeit a smaller crowd than the one that watched the American Idol final the night before). The Lakers missed a 3 point shot 

n the final seconds to tie the game so the series tied at 1-1. We had tickets for the Criss Angel/Cirque De Soleil show which wasn't due to start for over half an hour so we cashed in our $50 gaming chips. On our walk of the stip and the casinos the night before we had got the grasp of Craps (the dice game) so we headed over to the tables. We passed Roulette on the way so I had to stop here and put money on my number, 17. I have great faith in this number so put money on it, despite the dealer telling me my chips had much better odds on the Blackjack tables. I thanked him and put the money on 17 (Emer chose 23 with the other $5 we had to put on the table) and the ball was put in motion. It started to slow and caught the divisions between the numbers and caught flight. It bounced around the various numbers and started to slow down around 17. I got excited as it appeared to land in 17, only to bounce into 5 right beside it and settle. Again, I cursed my luck and we headed off to the Craps tables. Gambling in Vegas is quite expensive as all the casinos have $10 minimum bets, some up as high as $20 so unless you have a decent bankroll you can be out of money and chasing losings very quickly. We hit the craps table with our $40 in free bets and put $10 on the pass line. I won't bore you with the ins and outs of Craps but on the first roll you don't want to see a 2, 3 or 12. During all our rule learning over the previous two days we hadn't seen it but as soon as we had chips on the table, a 3 was rolled and that was another "$10" gone. We stuck another $10 down and survived the first roll. Once the first roll is done you can bet on a lot of things, basically betting that the roller will roll a certain number, higher odds if they do it the "hard" way i.e with doubles - a hard 8 is two 4's etc. We realised the only way to really win money is to bet on relatively long odds so we stuck another $10 on a hard eight. Craps continues until a 7 is rolled and then everyone loses their bet so naturally enough a 7 was rolled before we won any money and we were down to our last $10. We went in search of $10 Blackjack but could only find $15 minimum so we went back to Craps, put our last $10 on hard 8 and crossed our fingers. An easy 8 was rolled so we lost that $10 bet and were left with a grand total of zero winnings from our night of gambling. It was all free so it was alot easier to walk away but we really didn't get a feel for it since each bet was over so quickly. We headed over to the Theater to go into the show that was due to start in a few minutes.

When booking the hotel we were given a discount so we were able to get great seats, about 10 rows from the front in the middle third. The best way to describe Criss Angel is a popular David Blaine. He does illusion tricks in public like walk up the edge of building and levitate. He incorporated these kinds of acts into a Cirque De Soleil show featuring lots of incredible dancing which was very entertaining. Neither of us knew what to expect going into the show and left it quite satisfied with what we saw. I left Emer to watch her shows and go online while I took a stroll down the Strip to take some photos. I forgot to mention this during the first Strip walk but it is incredible the amount of people out handing out calling cards for prostitutes. You can't seem to walk a hundred yards without having cards forced upon you. 100 yards seemed to be 20 yards when I was walking as a single male without a girlfriend beside me. I walked around the various resorts taking photos and headed back to the room. It's amazing how many people are out on the strip even at 2 and 3 in the morning. They say that New York is the city that never sleeps, I think that description is much more apt for Las Vegas.

Friday morning brought checkout from the hotel at 11am but there was one more thing left to do before this Vegas adventure was to be finished. America is the gun capital of the world so I wanted to take advantage of this so we paid a visit to the gun store. Here you can rent a number of guns and try them out supervised and in a controlled manner. I chose an MP-5 sub machine gun, an AK-47 assault rifle and a .44 Magnum - just like Dirty Harry. I was given my ammunition and had to choose my target sheets. For the time in it my first choice was easy - the Terminator. For the country that was in it my second and third choice were also easy - Akmed the suicide bomber and Osama Bin Laden. We joined the queue and after a few minutes we were instructed to put on our eye and ear protection and we were brought into the range. First up was the MP-5, a "gentle" introduction to my time shooting. For the money you get two magazines to use with the MP-5 - if you hold the trigger the magazine will empty in a couple of seconds or one pull will release a 3 shot burst. They tell you to shoot in three shot bursts. The target was loaded (upside down as machine guns tend to rise) and sent down the range. I was given the gun, the magazine was loaded and I was on my own. 2 magazines were unleasehed on the Terminator in a minute or so and the target was brought back so I could admire my handiwork. He went out to get the next gun while I looked at the remnants of the target and rolled it up as a momento along with an empty casing.

Next up was the AK-47, a much different beast. I got one magazine for this one and it was more than enough - a longer, heavier gun with a much stronger kickback. I decided that Akmed the suicide bomber would fell the wrath of this gun. Again, holding the trigger would empty the magazine in a second or so or a single squeeze produced a 3 second burst. This gun being longer and heavier was still alot more accurate if handled correctly. Great fun and the holes were alot closer at the end. I was left to admire my handiwork again as he went out for the final gun of the session, the .44 Magnum.

Unbelievable!! It's so heavy you have to rest it on a box to keep it any way steady. This model had a scope on the end of it so we sent Osama to the end of the range. This gun is loaded 6 bullets at a time but since I had 20 he loaded them 5 at a time. I had a few practice squeezes before it was loaded to try and get the technique right. You are supposed to have a smooth squeeze, consistent the whole way through. This was easy to do when it was empty but it was a whole different kettle of fish when it was loaded. As you squeeze you can see the firing mechanism slowly rise and the barrel twist around to the next bullet. The nerves certainly build as you try and keep the crosshairs on the target and then BOOM!!! The flash and noise and kickback are really hard to describe. I shot a double barraled shotgun back home before and this had more kick behind it. The first shot got him right between the eyes but as fatigue kicked in the shots became a little more wayward. And it is tiring shooting the Magnum, brilliant fun but tiring. When all 20 shots were fired we brought the target back, posed again for a photo and then headed out. I picked up my souvenier t-shirt and we hit the road. I certainly don't believe in the gun culture in America but it was alot of fun shooting paper targets in a controlled environment.

We hit the road from Vegas and while we did there was a certain disappointment. I really feel like we didn't have enough time to do all the stuff and see all the sights that Vegas has to offer. It's a place I certainly plan on coming back to at some time in the future. But for the time being we have alot more of this huge and varied country to see.....